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Showing posts with label wealth. Show all posts
Showing posts with label wealth. Show all posts

Who, ME? I Can't Have THAT!

I was raised to accept less; to settle. My parents would be mortified to read this, and may, in fact, disagree, but the proof is in the pudding. I do not think I am worthy of the best. (Even in my mind as I type this, the little voice inside my head says 'Yes, I do! I LOVE the best!" )

Despite having made magnificent progress with my wealth mentality and my capacity to create and accept abundance these past few years, I noticed a distinct phenomenon the other day while out walking. I'd like to share it with you in case the insight can help you overcome a limiting belief that you share with me.

"I can't have that," is my limiting belief. Discovering this, I was shocked! Where did this come from? I certainly do not think this most of the time...

How I Discovered I'm Limiting Myself

I was walking along in one of my favourite neighbourhoods, and I came across a beautiful and unique house I had not seen before. It stopped me in my tracks and I was looking it over, feeling oddly guilty...as if someone was going to come out and say 'Hey, you! You don't belong here - get outta here!' I don't even know where that mentality comes from...



There are many beautiful homes in my neighbourhood, and I love lots of them. This particular house (as seen in the picture) is a little more unique and special, and there was something about it that struck me.

Then I noticed it was for sale! Now, here is the acid test of abundance mentality: my mind should have said nothing other than "Awesome! That's a sign from the Universe! How can I go about getting this house?" Can you guess what my mind said instead?...perhaps something like what your mind would say: "That's probably waaay more than I can afford. It's too big, anyway...plus, imagine the TAXES! They are probably about $20,000+ per year, and then I'd need a garderner and a full-time housekeeper, plus I'd lose my gym and swimming pool that I have now in my condo, plus blah blah blah..."

Ack! It was as if my mind had been taken over by the lack monster, whose job it was to show me 'reality.' I even noticed, as I walked down the street deflated but fighting myself, that I would look at other, lesser, older homes that needed fixing up and I would resonate with those instead. Now why would I identify with a crappy fixer-upper? Aside from my business instinct and love of fixing up real estate, there was a deeper belief at play here. Something inside me feels that I am not worthy of a fully landscaped, completely furnished, gorgeously decorated house with elegant lighting, an inground gunite pool and a waterfall. I haven't earned it, and I don't deserve it.

I thought I had purged all of my lack mentality. As this recognition dawned on me, I realized I had reached a new level which requires work. OK! I'm up to the challenge. I vowed to myself instantly that I would seek out things, places and circumstances I love, and that I would tell myself I am worthy until my entire self feels fully worthy. It's already working, and I can feel that old thought system dissolving away. Luckily, I have progressed enough to know how ridiculous that limiting thought process is, and I know that I will never have everything I want if I am the one telling me I can't have them...

(For those of you thinking, well you're right - you probably CAN'T have that - you're right - for YOU!)

Thinking it over, I notice that whenever I am presented with options, I'll choose the one that is slightly less. I'll leave the BEST for someone else; someone more worthy and who belongs with it. Ugh - what a horrible thought. Here are some examples which may help you identify any similar pattern in your own life:

  • When someone asks you what you'd like to do for the evening, do you choose an option that is the least bothersome and most 'easy' and familiar for all involved, or do you throw out some really exciting things you'd like to do? Sometimes a lack of self-worth is hidden within behavior that seeks to please everyone but self.


  • When you get dressed, do you always try and look your absolute best, and when you buy clothes, jewelry, etc. do you tend to gravitate to that which you really love and brings you joy, or to that which you can afford? We often broadcast what we think of ourselves by our choices in dress and in purchases. Would you feel more comfortable at an upscale, chic mall or at your local stripmall?

    This isn't about what you can afford at the moment; it's about what you feel you are worthy of. Even at the supermarket, do you pick the best, most luscious produce, or the measly lightweights...and why?


  • Relationships: From whom you find attractive to the person you develop a relationship with, your choices speak of your mentality. For instance, when I see a handsome gentleman I think I could impress or be the equal of, I feel sexy and empowered and I have no qualms giving him a second look as I walk by. If I see a super-good looking guy who is well-dressed and has a look that I feel almost intimidated by, I'll look down...I will not want him to notice me, and I'll assume he wouldn't anyway. He'd like a gorgeous, rich, tall, skinny and blonde Swedish model type, I'll tell myself. How bizarre! Now I realize there are many issues being manifested here, such as class mentality (perish the thought), natural selection, etc.. It's the issue of self-worth - of thinking there are men or any people who are too good for me - that I am addressing.


So. I have been left with a refined taste and appreciation for the exquisite things in life, coupled with a little voice in my head which assures me I can never have them. How daunting! Well, not for long. I can guarantee you now that I've found this limiting belief system, I'll purge it.

This is personal development at work, in real life. What will YOU do with your limiting beliefs...?

TIP: Have you ever heard of EFT? Short for Emotional Freedom Technique, EFT is a ground-breaking process used by highly skilled practitioners to help us bring up our limiting beliefs (which are often buried where they are hard to get at or even notice), and get rid of them. The technique is fantastic for a number of uses, and is based on the body's natural energy meridians.

Before experiencing this amazing process for myself, I was a skeptic. Having
seen the incredible, almost instant results, I am highly recommending you try
it, even if it doesn't make a lot of sense to you when you begin. Some resources
for EFT include:

  • Money Beyond Belief: The brilliant name of this program says it all, because that's what it's all about! Created by Brad Yates, one of the best-known EFT practitioners, and the wonderful Joe Vitale - aka 'Mr. Fire' - whom you may recognize from The Secret movie - this EFT program is specifically geared toward money issues.

  • Attracting Abundance with EFT: This book is by Carol Look, a renowned EFT practitioner with the gift of explaining it simply and teaching it to the multitudes. Carol has helped many people overcome a variety of issues.

  • ThrivingNow.com: This is the website of Rick Wilkes, an EFT practitioner who is passionate about his craft and down to earth in his approach. His site is an an in-depth and informative resource, with articles that explain the many facets of EFT and the possibilities for its use.

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Retirement and the Five Percent Return

All your life, you have likely been exposed to the concept of retirement. Save for retirement, you are told. Plan your life and your finances intelligently, so you'll have enough to last you in retirement. While this may all be very good advice, have you ever stopped to consider the pre-assumptions involved? It may seem intelligent, but it actually assumes a lack of intelligence in all of us.

Background

The entire concept of retirement is based on an antiquated system, where people used to work for one company all their lives. These loyal employees would work hard, build their pension and eventually retire and enjoy the benefits of those pre-paid and usually government-subsidized pension payments. In their golden years, the many decades of hard work one put in would be rewarded with time off and some income to ensure they would be OK to enjoy it.

We all know the dynamics of the workplace have changed very significantly, with more people changing jobs regularly, tasks being effectively outsourced and individuals choosing to consult rather than be employees. One can no longer rely on any corporation to provide for their future; we are each truly responsible for our own financial well-being.

Is Retirement a Four Letter Word?

There is a further issue to consider here, one that is largely unspoken, and that is the pre-assumption that you will have to work until you are old/er. It is presumed that you will not have or take control of your finances and create an asset base to serve you. You are not smart or capable enough to come up with ideas on your own; to start a lucrative business - or five! What about investing? Not 5% investing but 1000% investing? It is presumed that you will remain ignorant financially and will have a long, slow slog towards a day when you can finally (if you're lucky! - and have been good) quit your job and enjoy a little freedom. You, the average citizen, are not smart or capable enough to figure out another way. You believe (and will continue to believe) that the rich are just 'lucky' and that it is impossible or very difficult to become wealthy.

That the same institutions who perpetuate this myth purvey 'financial freedom' products is a cruel joke. The retirement industry keeps people ignorant and relies on that ignorance to continue selling low-yielding products such as GIC's, bonds and mutual funds. Has anyone ever told you to invest in bank STOCKS rather than bank products? Investing in bank products keeps the bankers laughing all the way to the bank.


5% = 0.05


The key to financial freedom, as I mention often at my new blog Women & Money, is EDUCATION: education that is applied with confidence and persistence. The internet has made it so easy to obtain good financial education that there is no excuse to be ignorant any longer. [Hint: Try investopedia.com and the myriad financial sites such as CBNC and Yahoo! finance for a start.] Even without the internet, we have libraries full of FREE books on everything from various stock market strategies to real estate investing and more. Further, there are means to wealth that the mutual fund companies and banks never mention. Now why is that? It's because they NEED naive investors to continue buying their products so they can - literally - bank the profits. Have you ever considered what they do with your money to make themselves more of it? Money can grow, and should.

Many people find numbers boring or intimidating, on top of the fact that they believe they have no control. However, control and freedom are within the grasp of each of us, if we only reach for them with determination. The incredible joy and hope you will feel when the 'numbers' go from boring or scary to beautiful - because they represent the wielding of control and understanding - is second to none. It is empowering, inspiring, and something we should ALL feel.

YOU CANNOT GET WEALTHY ON A 5% RETURN.
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I'm Not Who I Say I Am! (An Exploration)

Smelling the Flowers

If I want to be someone who is free to choose my daily activities and who enjoys life to the fullest each moment, then why am I not? ... I thought I was.

I have spent the past few years arranging and creating my life so that I work (play) from home, travel regularly, and can stop and smell the roses, so to speak, whenever I want. It has been a struggle, and a journey, and a marvelous learning adventure. One cannot create the life of their dreams without consciously doing so, and in the process learning and defining a LOT about themselves.

So why is it that I recently felt a strange pang of guilt as I watched people going off to work dressed in business attire and looking at me jealously or perhaps with - what was it? - disdain? As if, dressed in my casual clothes I was 'just a housewife' or something, and not contributing to normal society. Where did all these thoughts come from? Obviously from inside of myself, but I am shocked that they are there at all.

I had just sent my daughter off to school, and it was such a beautiful morning that I decided to take a walk around the neighborhood before returning to my computer. I live in a very vibrant and bustling community which was busy with commuters walking to the subway and driving past me to go to their workplaces. In my flowing summer skirt, t-shirt and flip-flops, I looked very separate from this rushing world. I have a been a part of it and chose to leave and pursue my very personal and ambitious dreams. I am home because I have exercised my personal power and created a life that is aligned with my highest value of freedom. Thus, this scene represented the results of that choice; I had the freedom to enjoy the little birds and the flowers and the stunning sunrise at my leisure, while people still 'trapped' rushed past me. So why did I feel guilty?...

Inner Conflict

This is a lesson in conflicting thoughts. It's good when they surface, because you can recognize them and straighten out your beliefs so they align with your values and desires. What I realised on this morning was that I am not who I say I am, at least not 100%. The reason I felt odd or awkward about not going to 'work' was that part of me must still be identifying with that ethic. Part of me must still believe that you have to work from 9 to 5 for a living, and that anyone who thinks otherwise is fooling themselves, or perhaps is lazy. This was an opportunity to see that my beliefs were not aligned with my desires. I was not identifying with what I say I am.

Do you think truly wealthy, free and happy people feel guilty about being so? Wouldn't that defeat the purpose?

I have noticed this as well when speaking with friends of my husband's. When they ask me 'what I do,' I somehow feel I must justify my existence by saying I work from home, or I own and operate a network of internet-based businesses, etc.. However, if my goal is to be independently wealthy, to just have fun investing my money and just be...well, HAPPY...then why should I feel the need to justify anything at all? Perhaps there is a need to fit in by having something to say with which they can identify. I need to give some thought to what I might be comfortable saying that speaks of who I am without attaching some job or label to it.

For now, I'm grateful for the opportunity to have noticed a limiting or misaligned belief, so that I can explore and change it to something that serves me better. This is the process by which we grow and change into the people we want to be - the people who are living the lives of our dreams!



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Wealth: Make it Your Friend

Do you want to be wealthy? Not sure why you haven't made it yet?...You are not alone. Millions of people feel that they don't have the wealth they 'deserve', but if you dig a little deeper, they have exactly what their subconscious mind thinks they deserve.

Many people claim that they want
great wealth, without realizing that there are deep changes in mindset that accompany such large lifestyle transformations. If you are currently struggling financially, your life - whether you know it or not - is a reflection of your inner thoughts and beliefs. The beliefs that support your current life and circumstances have to change significantly in order to accomodate an entirely new situation.

The great news is, YOU are at the helm of this ship, and with some effort and growth, you can change directions...and go wherever you want!

Today's Tip:
Make wealth a word that brings joy and happiness to your mind. If underneath your desire for more money lies disdain for wealthy people who drive or walk by, or negative judgement of others who are successful or wealthy, you have some underlying beliefs to explore before you can allow prosperity for yourself. Work on discovering your thoughts surrounding money and you will make a good start toward your future wealth. A simple exercise to help: take out some paper or your word processor and ask yourself 'what do I believe about money?' You may surprised to find some strong thoughts coming up...write until you come up blank, and date your entry so you can return to it later and track your progress.

Throughout this blog, you will find links and references to other sites and programs that are recommended. For some links I receive a small compensation and none for others. ALL links added by me have been thoroughly screened and are highly recommended. Enjoy, and check back often!

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